10 points to me!!

I'm winning at this mummy thing.

See, when it comes to new things, especially in parenting land - I often get a bit "highly strung" about them.

Before Princess Adelaide came along, I sort of thought I would have this parenting thing down pat.  Just another achievement in life - which would ride smoothly, as most of my 'achievements' do.  I had plenty of experience with babies and children so thought it would be ok.

My recommendation to most 'about to be' mothers would now be - read as little of the baby/parenting books as possible until you actually are a parent.  Cause they set you up with expectations of what it will be like, and it's much, much harder than that.

Anyway, you might remember from this, that we are on a toilet training journey at the moment.  Of course, being my eldest, this is my first time toilet training a kid.  So my approach - I expected too much of my girl, and myself - result = highly strung mother, frustration and meltdowns....

I've been here before - trying to get a baby Princess A to sleep more than 45 minutes in the day.  After a million cold cups of coffee, listening to her screaming for hours, trying every suggested method and weeks of being depressed and feeling a failure - my good friend - offered me a piece of advice.

Something like this -
instead of fighting it, just let it go.

Her number 2 was a similar baby to my girl.  He never did more than 45 minutes either.  Once she let it go, she felt better and coped better.  You know what - so did I.

I should follow that advice 95% of the time I'm doing something new with my kids.  It usually takes me a while to remember.  Anyway, the day after I decided to "let it go" on the toilet training business, Princess A decided she would actually get the hang of it.

Now, she is a bright wee cookie.  And a sensitive one.  So she's quite particular.  This has involved some wee's in the bath.  I can reassure you that now about 95% of the time, she goes on the potty.

The story goes, we were in the supermarket today and suddenly she announces, "mummy, I need to do wees" - in the voice that means, I can hold on for a minute or two, but no longer.  One problem, mummy forgot the potty.  Usually a meltdown would follow this, because the "toilet" is too "big for me".

Well, I announced in that mummy voice that we had no potty, and pak n save only had a big toilet.  To my delight, she said she wanted to go on the big toilet.  (She must of REALLY needed to go).

So I drop my trolley, load my screaming Mr John into his carseat, take him, my handbag, the toys she brought into the supermarket, and make a dash to the loo.  I was hoping like anything she wasn't going to have me sit there waiting for an hour (as she has on other days).

Well, very maturely, she did it!  Success to me!  She had to mind you, that, or the uncomfortable feeling of wet pants.  We had to make a second trip at the end of our shopping - success again!

So, since I've taken on the advice - just let it go, she is proving to me that she can do it!  And when there is a relaxed mother involved - she is even better at it!

What have we done well?  Well, we waited to train her until she was absolutely ready - I am pleased to say that she is so precise about going, that she has not had any accidents.  We have tried before - and there were accidents every time.  There is something about waiting until they are ready for things that makes it much less "work".

She initiates, I assist by bribing encouraging the right things.  (I don't bribe all the time - but you have to get your kid out of the bath to do wee's somehow!)  That should be how it is with most of their learning independence.

I'm the big person, so I should act big.  She is the little person, so it is quite ok for her to act little, make mistakes, inconvenience me with her requests for the bathroom, sitting on the potty for an hour at a time and all the rest - but I must take control.

Yep, I'm winning on this one. ;-)